As I was writing this article, I was thinking to myself “what is acceptance?” and “is it different for everybody?” And I found lots of different definitions.
You may well have your own.
A common definition seems to be “It’s a person's assent to the reality of a situation, recognising a process or condition (often a negative or uncomfortable situation) without attempting to change it, protest, or exit”.
A bit mindboggling eh?
I think of it as that time when you have let go of the past and are living in the present and planning for the future.
So I thought I’d go back to “The Discovery” and ask you to think what you have learned from this phase and the articles written that have led you to this acceptance. The learning will undoubtedly be useful for the future!
If you have:-
Kept yourself emotionally and physically safe.
Reflected by journaling.
Made sure that you have positive support.
Explored how you respond to stress and whether you need to make any changes in order to have a different response.
Realised that you have choices in what you believe and can change beliefs about love and relationships that limit you.
Explored your inner thoughts and asked yourself the should questions.
Looked at the situation from a different perspective and continued to use those skills.
Thought about your purpose, your identity and your values and beliefs and aligned your skills, behaviours and environment with these.
Then, I think you may well have arrived at a state of acceptance of the situation and made some choices. Am I right?
If I’m wrong and you feel that you are not at that place yet, ask yourself this question. "What would be the one thing that I could think or do that would enable me to get to that place of acceptance.”
If you answer that question you would therefore know that you have chosen to be in a place that is OK for you at this moment. That would be a very good place to start that journey towards your dreams and your new life. It would mean that you had let go of the past and decided to enjoy the now and the future with curiosity and excitement, wouldn’t it?
Let’s do a bit of thinking and answer these questions:
What have I let go of that has brought me to this place of acceptance? The five major negative emotions.
What have I learned that has allowed me to get to a place of acceptance?
What will I continue to do that will keep me in a place of acceptance?
Letting go of major negative emotions can be hard, because, after all, they ruled your life for a while, didn’t they? These questions may help:
What purpose is that negative emotion there for?
Knowing that negative emotions, when held on to, cause stress and disease, what could you do instead of doing these emotions that would keep you safe and living your life to the full? What are the learnings that you need to accept at an unconscious level that will help you to let go of these emotions?
Interesting questions aren’t they?