Individuals are used to running their own bank accounts. In a relationship this changes and usually one person takes control of the finances to save time and energy.
When the relationship breaks down there is the inevitable insecurity about running individual accounts and emotional lack of trust is reflected in finances.
Where is the money? What joint resources do we have? How much am I entitled to? How will I cope financially?
Common questions very easily answered if you seek professional help from a sympathetic and experienced adviser.
The most important characteristic of any adviser is that they are empathetic and sensitive to some pretty raw emotions and conscious of insecurities stirred up by the Discovery.
Step 1: Face the fear. Ask for a joint financial statement so that you know where you are in terms of assets and debts. You are entitled to this information and it has to be up-to-date and complete.
Step 2: Handle the current. Work out your own financial needs in the present. Having an idea of current expenditure and requirements is going to come in handy in a settlement and for planning ahead.
Step 3: Consider a strategy for future financial security. This is a really handy thing to address. Using the information from Steps 1 and 2, and integrating the information, means that you will have a plan.
Step 4: Work the plan. If you need to get a job look further on the website for handy advice. If you need re-training, there is plenty of information to get you started. If you need to find accommodation, a strategy for staying in your own home, or if you need to consider buying a new property there are links all over the site. Just make sure that, once you are aware of the cost implications, you build this into your plan.
Step 5: Move on. There is nothing like financial emancipation. Being in control of what you spend and how you spend it, how you earn it or make it work if you have a capital financial settlement, can be an exciting and cathartic process if managed correctly.